Parents Missing practice for homework and tests

[MILgymFAM]

I was just talking with someone about this regarding the military. While it is necessary, and makes sense for the context, total blind obedience even then is not okay. If a soldier follows an order to do something illegal the soldier can be held liable. Tricky as disobeying can also cause them trouble, but still, it is a case where even in the military you can't obey without thinking.

Oh, I couldn't agree more, and my husband and I have had loooong conversations about unlawful orders. I also understand why immediacy is drilled into them- their lives could depend on a lack of hesitation. I was just saying that (hopefully) nothing in my kids' day to day lives will have that kind of urgency, and they will always take a moment to think before acting.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

The difference in the US is that the standardized "high stakes" exams have ZERO impact on a student's grade. Those exams are for the progress tracking of the school, and are just used as benchmarking for the kids but meaningless in the overall scheme until SAT/ACT in high school.

Having a child who routinely performs better when given time to do the work and struggles under exam conditions, the UK/Aussie model would be a disaster for her.

Can't speak to all states and or schools. But if a district is teaching to the test, it is a school/district decision. And personally I could care less how my kid does on those tests and she knows it.

Our district while they teach to the standards, they don't teach to the "tests". They go out of their way to make sure the kids are not stressing the test. And our state is making changes to the "tests". Short term change is there is no longer a time limit. The kids can take as long as they like. And adjustments to the actual tests and questions, including tossing them.Long term they are reviewing the standards and making changes, especially regarding is a standard age appropriate, teachers from the all over the state are involved in this and parents can also go on line and give feedback. And finally our state is going to change testing vendor.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

but it is definitely not the norm in the US.

It is probably more common then you think. You tend to know where you go. So if your kids are in brick and mortar schools it is unlikely you would know many home schoolers. Do a search on the net and or FB. I bet you find plenty of information on local home school coops in your area and plenty of information and stats on home schooling.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

People keep saying that the homework issue (and I'm not even saying don't do it) is training kids for adult life. I can't possibly be the only one who has questioned orders and/or procedures from a boss? Can I? I was fairly successful at my previous professions and I always felt free to question if an assignment felt wrong, or even if I felt it could be done better. I've never been fired for doing so, but I have been promoted.

All homework is not training kids for life. "Homework" has a very broad definition. Some is terrible, some is Ok, some is great. And it is very much teacher and district dependent.

Spelling for example. Daughter had one (3rd) teacher, her requirement, 2 exercises due on Friday (also the day of the test). The kids had all kinds of choices, write them in 3 different colors, do them on the computer in different fonts, spell the words in cheerios or using legos and take pictures, write sentences, make a cross word puzzle, a story, spell on your parents back and have them guess the word and a ton more. You could do them any day of the week, just 2 due by Friday.

Next teacher (4th). No homework assigned for spelling. Learn the words however it works for you, just make sure you know them by test day.

This year (5th). The teacher is very rigid. She assigns specific tasks, due on specific days. Oddly (or maybe not) she is the oldest teacher my daughter has had. 30 years teaching, 25 of them 5th grade. She is 2 yrs away from retirement. She is very old school. Told us a story on open house how her (now grown) kids would miss cub scouts a lot because scouts was on Thursday and that was they day the had writing. Me, I'm sitting there thinking why didn't she have her kids do the writing on Wed so they could go to scouts. She is the one I had the battle with. So we now get some work ahead of time. Yeah I'm not a fan of the "because I said so style" of teaching or parenting.

Appropriate homework will help the learning process, with time management and help develop good study habits. As education continues there is more work to be covered. It would be unlikely that you could get through college only going to class. Much work has to be done outside of class. Many college kids have huge issues because they never learned time management and prioritization. Homework helps with this. Also homework should remediate learning. Just enough should be given to see if the kids have gotten whatever concept is being taught. A few problems, not dozens. And in theory parents shouldn't be correcting it. Because its supposed to also provide feedback to the teacher, so the teacher can see how everyone is doing with the concept. Did they get it or did everyone have issues. Then the teacher knows they have to reteach the concept. You don't need to assign a lot just to keep kids busy but some appropriate work is not a bad thing. And work should be given with plenty of time for kids to learn how to manage their time. Amount should be age appropriate.

All homework is not bad. Some homework is not bad. Bad homework is horrible.

 

[twinmomma]

All homework is not bad. Some homework is not bad. Bad homework is horrible.

All work assignments aren't bad. Some work assignments are not bad. Bad work assignments suck.

But guess what? I still have to do them. Even if I question (as opposed to blindly obeying) and my boss says no this is the direction we are going, I still have to do them.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

All work assignments aren't bad. Some work assignments are not bad. Bad work assignments suck.

But guess what? I still have to do them. Even if I question (as opposed to blindly obeying) and my boss says no this is the direction we are going, I still have to do them.

Oh I agree. Again, not thrilled with how her 5th grade teacher does things, but we deal. It was really folks saying homework doesn't represent adult life.

It does. Sure there may be the odd thing you can get out of at work. But all those folks professing they have choices or can question the boss. I am sure that is true. And I am also sure if they don't finish what they have to do on time or question to much, it won't be rewarded, promotions won't come and firing could happen. I work in healthcare, we get inspected by no less than 3 agencies. I can assure you there are many things I must do that are redundant, not necessary etc.... And if I don't do them, I will be placed on corrective action and if I were to continue not to do them I will be fired. And a lot of those things don't have a lot of flexibility.

When my daughter complains about having to do say homework or set the table because she doesn't want to. I remind her, going to work, going grocery shopping, cooking dinner, pick her up from school, doesn't thrill me either but I do it.

 

[momto8in10]

I don't think it is about blind obedience , I think it is about discipline . If my daughter (an 11 yo L8, 6th grade ) is assigned homework , she had better do it. She may question it if she likess , but she had better do it. I agree that it sets good habits and work ethics for her adult life , as well as teaching her about time management . This is my job , to prepare them for adulthood ; not to make things easy on them until they get there , and then turn them loose .
DD leaves the house at 6:50 every morning . I pick her up at 3:25 and we go straight to gym . Practice starts at 4 and she gets home around 8:45. Dinner , bath , chores and schoolwork, she is lucky to get to bed at 11. M-F. It is no life for an 11 year old , but this is what she wants . Last week she said "it's my life" , and it is.
We are lucky in that our schools give very little homework . I have kids in elementary , middle and high, and they rarely have anything other than reading and math/spelling practice.
I don't know what I would do if my daughter needed to miss practice to do homework . I would hope that she is learning to manage her time well enough to never be in that position . That is what I am trying to teach her .

 

[Deleted member 18037]

And we have pages and pages about homework and practice. What about meets on Friday which require pulling kids out of school.

Around here that door swings both ways. Sometimes she needs to be pulled from school. And sometimes, she needs to miss practice for school stuff.

Again, its called prioritization.

 

[sce]

And we have pages and pages about homework and practice. What about meets on Friday which require pulling kids out of school.

Around here that door swings both ways. Sometimes she needs to be pulled from school. And sometimes, she needs to miss practice for school stuff.

Again, its called prioritization.

This is a great perspective!